16 September, 2005

Direction? (aka navel-gazing)

I've written two posts this morning that I have since taken down. They were both highly political, though one also contained what I discovered to be a significant error only minutes after I posted it. But today is not the only time I have started a political post and then abandoned it.

I think I've been dancing around this for awhile now. I didn't set out to do a political blog. I'm not even sure why I started blogging. Beyond the friendly encouragement to do so, I think I saw it as a fun way to interact with my online friends--most of whom seemed to be bloggers. And it's been kind of fun to be able to link to something important myself, rather than try and shop it around to a blogging friend. Additionally, once Valour-IT became a part of my online presence, I found myself worrying about the impact of strong political statements in this blog on my attempts to run a charity project free of strong political association or entanglements.

Among certain close family and friends I do not hesitate to discuss politics and I vigorously and fearlessly defend my views. I feel comfortable because we understand each other and trust the values and heart of all who are assembled and debating their views; we are free to disagree without being slandered or attacked or labeled narrowly. But debating in a public forum means opening oneself up to the possibility of divisive misunderstandings, stereotyping of character and personality (because of lack of personal interactions), and worst of all, the trollish types so common in such forums.

No, I don't shirk from standing up for my beliefs for fear that I will be rejected. I believe (and think) what I do, and you can take or leave it. But I think the ugly blowblack that can come from such a stance is probably not something I really want to deal with. It's dark and depressing, and rarely productive. Yes, I suppose that's kinda wimpy...

But yet, the more personal writing I have done recently, like Friends? and It's That Date Again... seem self-indulgent and are almost more revealing than I'm comfortable with.

But then, where to go with this? Should I let this become a substantially political blog? It could certainly make things interesting around here, haha! The alternative seems to be simply a personal diary and linkfest (both of which are perfectly fine in and of themselves, but feel self-serving for me). So, what direction shall I take? Where from here?