You Couldn't Write This...

Here's my scene for a baseball-related novel: famous baseball player hits line drive that breaks the nose of his opponent's #2 pitcher. Two batters later, same player barrels down the baseline to homeplate...

Whereupon he collides with the team's back-up catcher and gives him a sprained ankle. All of which occurs the day after their #1 pitcher (2007 Cy Young Award winner) is placed on the disabled list, and while their regular starting catcher--who got injured a couple days into the season while simply throwing a ball back to the pitcher--is still doing rehab in the minor leagues.

Think anybody would believe it?

Picked to contend in their division--for the fourth year straight--the Padres have been a disaster. These first two months of the season have been full of bizzarro bounces of the ball, once-reliable players making unexplainable errors, dead bats, and incomprehensible umpires. As one of the Padres broadcasters said tonight after the second injury, "I'd ask, 'what's next?' But I'm afraid to find out!"

Well, there's always next year...